Random Fun-ness!

Aha! I feel very clever at this particular moment. Want to know why? No? Well, I'm telling you anyway. Squid and I are going to have a party! 'twill be at Lundstrom park, and we will do fun and random things, and then we will go to my house and watch one of the old Star Wars movies. (Because the old ones are infinitely better, AND they have Harrison Ford in them, and he's hot.) And I am inviting many people, and I hope they all go, because it's always cooler if they all go. I wanted to play the "bubble gum in the pudding" game, but my mom won't let us because it is messy. :( But that's okay, because we're gonna do lots of randomly fun things, like Bigger or Better, which is a ball, and Ninja Destruction, and WOW I'm hyper. On a sad note, Winston hasn't communicated with me in a week, and it doth make me quite sad. Anyway, don't eat the cat, so long and thanks for all the fish, live long and prosper, etc, etc. Love you!

AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

I am SO DEPRESSED!!!! And actually, I'm not entirely sure why. I'm quite frustrated. And, I'm kind of mad at Winston. Stupid Winston. I guess it's not his fault that he has no idea how much I miss him. I feel the need to knit something large. Something large and comforting. That would be fantastic. Maybe I will. My hands are dry. I should put lotion on them. Wouldn't that be clever of me? I guess that's all. Bye folks!

The Joys of Dry Socks.

Hello my good people! (oh heck yes, I now have 3 followers!!!) And this picture actually looks something like me. I have just returned from Trek. It was great, and Martin's cove was beautiful. Except for my person (Sarah Jane Wilkinson, aged 7) died in Iowa City. I didn't make it to Martin's Cove. It's okay though, because it is my theory that Sarah Jane was one of the angels who helped those poor, tired, starving pioneers push their handcarts when they couldn't anymore. Martin's Cove is amazing. It's so peaceful, and sad, and inspirational all at the same time. My favorite place though, was Rock Creek Hollow. Rock Creek Hollow was the place right after Rocky Ridge, and the Spirit is so strong there, it's amazing. The unnamed graves were so sweet. I liked the sweet pioneer stories. Although, I have to say, our little experience was barely even a taste of what the pioneers had to go through. I just have to say, I am thankful that my ancestors did that for me, so that I can be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints today. Ok. Seriously though, on one of the hikes, we had to walk through knee deep mud, and nobody brought extra shoes, and so be grateful that there are such things as dry, clean socks. I mean it. You don't know until it's happened to you. Just trust me on this one. I got a mosquito bite on my lip. (Wyoming mosquitoes don't care if you're wearing bug spray or not, they'll bit you anyway. Many times in a row.) It swelled and got numb. It was okay though. Things that made me happy today:

• I got to come home from Trek and shower
• Testimony meeting
• Thinking about my ancestors
• Cookies
• Lindhardt
• COOKIES!!!

Snorkeling

You'd think that, by the title of this post, I'd be talking about snorkeling. But in fact, you'd be wrong. I am actually talking about how I am going on Trek tomorrow at 5:15 AM, and will not be back until between 9:00 and 10:00 PM on Saturday. I'm not excited about Trek anymore, mainly because I remembered that I hate camping and nature and walking and stuff. And also, my family does not consist of very many people that I am fond of, and Kathy's brother is in my family, and he hates me for no apparent reason. That, and my stake is actually full of mostly very snobbish people. Sorry to be such a pessimist. <3 you all... which right now is really just Jeli, but I love you Jeli! Things that made me happy today:

• I bought two really cute jackets, one polar fleece, and one a hoodie
• I slept for six hours this afternoon
• Lindhardt's new hair is kind of funny... Sorry Lindhardt, but it's true.

Writer's block

I HATE writer's block. It is possibly the worst sensation I have ever felt. It's like, you're whizzing along, creating another world, unfolding the events of a person's life, and then WHAM!!! you hit a brick wall. And those things hurt if you hit them hard enough. I've started so many novels, and they all end up in the same place... on my writer's block shelf. I want to finish one!

Opera 'n' stuff.

Ok. Today I basically slept, ate, and went to opera practice. If I haven't told you already, I'm in Utah Festival Opera Company's production of "Carmen." Anyway, I get to be one of the annoying kids bothering Don Jose and the rest of the soldiers. We get to have wooden swords and throw things across the stage, and three of the smaller kids get to jump on their backs. The directors are nice, so far, but I bet when they're more stressed they'll be meaner. That's how directors are. Lyrics to I Got U by Blake Lewis: Four in the morning Heart on my sleeve. In your eyes, possibilities I confess this is new to me But maybe this is love. I got to know that this thing is real That you're feeling just what I feel No more room in this heart to steal You know it's had enough In the morning when I wake up You're the first thing that I think of I can make it through anything Knowing that I've got you. In the morning when I wake up Nothing else can take the place of you And I know this sounds crazy, but I don't know where this is I don't know what I'm in I can't see down the road But it don't matter long as I got you My world could fall apart This life could get to hard There's so much that I can loose But it don't matter long as I got you, long as I got you. My heart beats so fast I just can't keep up You pull on me like a drug. I'll never go cold cause I don't wanna give you up. Some people search their whole life to find what I found now. Im out of time gotta tell you what's on my mind And pray that it's enough In the morning when I wake up You're the first thing that I think of I can make it through anything Knowing that I've got you. In the morning when I wake up Nothing else can take the place of you And I know this sounds crazy, but I don't know where this is I don't know what I'm in I can't see down the road But it don't matter long as I got you My world could fall apart This life could get to hard There's so much that I can loose But it don't matter long as I got you, long as I got you. Think about it We fit like a puzzle, no missing pieces Never doubt it. I'm writin' a story and you're my thesis Look around it. Its happenin' natural as can be Since I found it I'm not gonna let it go, let it go I don't know where this is I don't know what I'm in I can't see down the road But it don't matter long as I got you My world could fall apart This life could get to hard There's so much that I can loose But it don't matter long as I got you, I don't know where this is I don't know what I'm in I can't see down the road But it don't matter long as I got you My world could fall apart This life could get to hard There's so much that I can loose But it don't matter long as I got you, long as I got you. As long, long as I got you now. As I got you now

Church today

Today at church, we learned about reaching out to others. It was taught by Sister Macy (incidentally, she was John Bytheway's first date) and was a VERY good lesson. "It is not what we receive in life that matters, it is what we give." Or something like that. In Sunday school, neither of teachers showed up, so we talked the whole time. I'm sad, because Kathy and Beverly aren't even in my company for trek. So I'll barely even see them. I still need to find four ounces of biodegradable liquid soap, which apparently is sold in the camping section at Wal-mart. You know what? Collin isn't that bad. I never really liked him, but he's a good guy. I love it when I realize that people don't suck. Oh! I forgot to mention this. Sister Macy gave out sweet-tarts, and my tongue is raw. So I am now going to put a band-aid on it. Mainly just so I can say that I have put a band-aid on my tongue. I think that's actually pretty cool. But I'm just a nerd like that.

Mleh.

Wait!!! I have to see if this works!!! And also, I'm depressed. But only mildly. And yes, I'm aware that this is my fifth post today.

Sorry!

Okay, I know that I've done like four posts today, but it's MY blog. I just wanted to point out that when I blog, it's not my fault that there ARE NO PARAGRAPHS. I mean it. I tried to indent. Nothing. I tried skipping lines. Nada. It seems that no matter what I do, it's going to publish it all on ONE BIG PARAGRAPH. I am highly annoyed, and am terribly sorry if this bothers you as much as this bothers me.

That's it... :(

Well, he's gone. That is to say, he has moved to his new home in Hyrum, which is like, fifteen to thirty minutes away from Logan. I know, we're still in the same valley and everything. But this is pretty much the end. Hyrum is in the Cache Valley School District, while Logan is in (well, duh) Logan School District. He says he's going to Logan High, but he hasn't registered yet. And I mean, really, what's the point? He won't even like me at the end of the summer anyway... Okay, Canada. Get a grip on yourself. First of all, I'm sure you will see him again, and he said that he would go to Logan. And if he doesn't, so what? You'll move on. ...maybe. And, seriously, even if you don't, you can still email him and stuff. Think about it. Why waste your time worrying? If he doesn't like you anymore, GIVE UP!!! Move on. There are lots of guys who would love to be with you. But then again, isn't there that saying, "Never give up on somebody you can't go a day without thinking about."? I mean it. I can't go twenty minutes. It's very depressing. GET A LIFE, GIRL!!!! that is all.

Top 10 things that worry me

1. That I'll never see Winston again
2. That Winston doesn't really like me
3. That I liked Paul more than I like Winston
4. That we won't make enough money
5. Spiders
6. High School
7. Being in front of my ward
8. dying some tragic death
9. not knowing what others think about me
10. my appearance... I'm always worried about how I look... especially when boys are around.

Depression

How does one know if one is depressed? Here are a few good signs. #1 To start things off, you will tend to feel very sad #2 You'll be very pessimistic #3 The once-cheerful world will develop a darker hue #4 You will avoid talking to family and friends #5 You may even feel as though the world would be better off without you. Just a note, the world would totally suck without you, and anyway, killing yourself won't accomplish anything, seeing as you'll still feel those troubles in the afterlife. Sorry. I'm sort of making sure that I'm not depressed. I'm not. Anyway, for the past couple days, things have been very uneventful. (thank goodness) Unfortunately, my summer is not going to stay that way. But anyway, in the past two days, I've read some really fantastic novels. The first is an LDS novel, called Emily. It's really good, and has so much spiritually lifting content. It made me quite happy. The second is called The Year of the Secret Assignments. It's good also, but swears a couple times. It's a riot! And there's a character also named Emily. It seems that lately, Emily has been a name that I can't stay away from. I miss Winston. I haven't really talked to him in a while, and it's quite depressing. That's why I was making sure that I'm not depressed. You know, it's stupid that I'm still writing this blog thing, because nobody is even reading it. I should force my friends to. It would serve them right. But really, it's not that interesting. I've just been ranting about random junk the whole time. I mean, think about it. (But only if you've read the rest of my blog) I'm basically saying "Today, I woke up. I did stuff. I went to sleep." ... okay. It's not that bad. But, it would be nice if people would read it. I mean, my random comments can occasionally be quite witty, or at the very least, induce a small chuckle. Things that made me happy today: #1 The book I read was very cute #2 My mother let me procrastinate my chores until 6 PM! #3 I thought about the first time Winston held my hand... <3>

Trek Family

So, today I went to a meeting to meet my trek "family" for the first time. It was cool, I guess, except for I'm the youngest person in it. (I'm 14, and they were all 16 or 17.) On the plus side, there's a boy I like in it! But on the down side, there's this guy who totally hates me for no apparent reason. There are nine kids, four guys and five girls. It should be a blast, well, mostly. I'm not too psyched about the whole "Waking up early" and "no showering" and "camping" stuff, but it should be fun anyway. It'll be cool to see Martin's Cove and cross the Sweetwater River. We get to go square dancing! I love square dancing. It's a six hour bus ride though... Ick. Oh, and we have to BE at the stake center at five thirty AM! fun, right? Yeah. Things that made me happy today: ~ I got to go to the library ~I found a lot of good books ~Will is in my trek family ~I ate a really yummy ice cream/popsicle thing ~I learned how to make my hair wavy with a curling iron ~I learned how to make my hair curly with a flat iron ~I ate cantaloupe!

Choir Party

Today was the Cantate Choir party in Jill's backyard. (Jill DeVillbis is our choir director) It was way fun. The food was yummy. (I ate mostly cookies) We played an assortment of random, fun games, that I will attempt (Probably rather poorly) to explain to you. They're a blast! Ninja Destruction: To begin with, everybody stands in a circle. Everybody rubs their hands together (Like you're trying to warm them up) and shouts "Ninja destruction!" Then, the beginning person gets one move to try to hit another person's wrist or hand. (It counts if it hits below where your watch would go.) You only get one move to hit, and one move to dodge. If you get hit, you're out. You go around the circle counter clockwise until one person is victorious. (Please note: The game is more fun if you make ninja noises when you strike) Cracker Attack: In this game, everybody has to have a saltine cracker tied to one of their belt loops with dental floss. Your cracker must be showing. You roll up paper and try to hit other people's crackers with your paper sword. The goal is to be the last person with any cracker still remaining. (It's okay if your cracker breaks, as long as you still have some left.) If your cracker breaks completely off, or falls off, you're out. Haiku: Basically, this game is the most fun when you have ten or more players. The first step is to break up into two even lines. The person at the end of one line stands at one end of the center with their back towards everybody. The person at the end of the other line stands at the other end of the center also with their back towards everybody. The groups shout "One, two, three, HAIKU!" At that moment, the people with their backs toward the group turn around and walk towards each other, trying to keep a straight face while trying to make the other person laugh. If one of them laughs, they both go to the end of the other team's line. If nobody laughs, you return to the end of your original line. If they both laugh, they switch sides. The goal is to be the team that has everybody on it, but usually you just go until people get tired of it. Stinger: In this game, everybody stands in a circle with their eyes closed. One person goes around and taps people on the shoulder. One tap, and you're just a normal person. Two taps, and you're the stinger. Next, everybody just walks around and shakes hands. If you're the stinger, you squeeze their hand twice. If you get stung, you must then shake one other person's hand, and then scream loudly and pretend to die. You are then out. The whole point is to guess who the stinger is. You can make an accusation, and if you guess correctly, the game starts over, however, if you are wrong, you're out. I really thought that all of these games were very fun. I liked them quite a lot. I'm SO excited for Trek! I'm going NEXT WEEK!!! I've decorated my bucket. (My bucket is my suitcase and my stool.) I still have to sew my skirt. I want to know who is in my family. *Does an excited happy dance* Things that made me happy today: ~The movie "Fireproof" ~Opera practice (I'm in Carmen) ~Ninja Destruction ~I made progress on my novel! ~I went a whole day without talking to Winston, and I'm not insane! ~Our butterflies are starting to come out of their chrysalises! That's all folks! ~Emily

Day 4

Yeah. I skipped a day. Sorry! But guess what? I had Winston and Kathy over to my house today. We watched the Prestige (Great movie by the way) and then just hung out and stuff. It was very fun. At least, I thought it was. <3 I have molars growing in, and they hurt. Now I know why babies cry when they're teething.

Love quotes

The Quotes A masterpiece written by many " Love is like breakfast: You want it, you feel empty without it, and it gets you through the day. Not having it leaves you tired and depressed, although you can technically live without it. When you have love, your day goes better." "Happiness is being married to your best friend." "Love is like the North Star. In a changing world, it's always constant." "I'm here. Which roughly translated means I would rather die than stay away from you. I'm an idiot." "You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams." "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." "Never say goodbye. Because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting." "You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you.... That's where I'll be waiting." "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." "Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own." "I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out." "If I could dream at all it would be about you. And I'm not ashamed of it." "We accept the love we think we deserve." "'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." "There is never a time or a place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment." "I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without any complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way." "Happiness is the most attractive accessory a young woman can have." "A man sees in the world what he carries in his heart." "The only boy who deserves you is the one who thinks he doesn't." "Boys aren't worth your tears, and the one who is shouldn't be making you cry in the first place." "He gave her 12 roses, 11 real and 1 fake and said,' I'll love you until the last rose dies.'" "I love you, and that's all I really know." "A girl worth kissing is not easily kissed." "Never give up on someone you can't you a day without thinking about." "I love it when in the middle of our kiss, I can feel you smiling." "You know what I liked best? How hours after you kissed me, I still felt it on my lips." "She handed him the pieces of her heart and said, 'I'm sorry.' Then he hugged her and whispered, 'Don't worry, I'll fix it.'" "I can't help but smile when I walk into a room and see you." "For every girl with a broken heart, there's a boy with a glue gun." "I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met." "When I see you, my heart smiles." "I can't wait for the day he wakes up and realizes he loves me." "I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." "I can't live in a world where you don't exist." "One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving." "Love is irrational, the more you loved someone, the less sense anything made." "He's more myself than I am. Whatever souls are made of, his and mine are the same." "Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained." "The great tragedy of life is not that men perish, but that they cease to love ." "You know how they say you only hurt the ones you love? Well, it works both ways." "Choose your love. Love your choice." "Be careful who you fall for, because sometimes they won't catch you." "Do I love you because you are beautiful? Or are you beautiful because I love you?" "He is the cheese to my macaroni." "If I love you, what business is it of yours?" "It doesn't matter who you are or what you look like, so long as somebody loves you." "Blood may be thicker than water, but love is thicker than blood." "We like someone because. We love someone although." "The minute I stopped trying to find the right guy, and started trying to be the right girl, the guy came." "Sometimes, you just got to run away to see who will chase you." "I don't know what I've gained from you, but the need for anyone else is what I've lost." "To lose balance sometimes for love is part of a balanced life." "LOVE is a friendship set to music." "One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life and the world: that word is love." "If I thought we were never to meet again,... I should not care to live another hour." "Love comes to us in varied guise. I saw you and my heart went out to you at once." ""He came to her and took her hand, then drew her roughly to him and kissed her. He didn't say anything, and turned away before he could see the surprised happiness that brightened her eyes." "Want to see something beautiful? Look in a mirror." "You are amazing. Why can't you see it?" "If you love somebody, set them free. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't they never were." "The best proof of love is trust." "Love takes of masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within." "In love the paradox occurs that two beings become one and yet remain two." "At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet." "A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous." "Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go." "And ever it has been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation." "Hearts are not to be had as gifts. Hearts are to be earned." "The richest love is that which lasts through time apart to someday be together." "It's not missing you that kills me. It's knowing that I once had you in my life that does." "To the world, you may be one person, but to one person you are the world." "Love is like Pi: natural, irrational, and very important." "There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved." "A loving heart is the truest wisdom." "Only love lets us see normal things in an extraordinary way." "Other men have seen angels, but I have seen thee, and thou art enough." "The first duty of love is to listen." "The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss." "There is no remedy for love but to love more." "There is always some madness in love. But there is always some reason in madness." "When you think of me, what immediately comes to mind?' 'Well, two things. 1. you. 2. love.'"

Day 3 (part bacon)

You know, I don't actually like bacon. I'm a vegetarian. I just remembered. I met Winston at the library yesterday. It made me quite happy. That's it.

Day 3

Okay, so this is the third day of my blog. I think that's pretty cool. My mom is starting to really get on my nerves. She's constantly bugging me about Winston (name has been changed for his protection) and how I am going out with him. She's bugging the CRAP out of me. Seriously. She's always accusing me of kissing him, and whispering sweet nothings into his ear. And even though I told her she has nothing to worry about, she won't stop! And now she's limiting my communication with him. I can't stand it. Sorry. Just had to get that off my chest. Anyway, today so far I have taken a shower, done laundry (my least favorite activity), and finished the book I was reading. I just realized that I still have to flip my calender to June. (It's still on may.) Argh! My mom is now nagging me to play duets with her. I HATE doing that. Yes mom, I want you to remind me that you're so much better than I am at the flute. That makes me feel just great. I hate chores. They suck. Do you think that I should be so pissed at my mom for trying to protect me? Don't answer that. It was a rhetorical question. I know she means well, but I feel like I'm being smothered. And I hate not having my freedom. I like to be able to make my own decisions, something that she is not letting me do right now. I am trustworthy, and she knows it. I wish she would leave me alone.

Day 2

Hey guys! I have a question for you. Do you think that it is ever okay to lie? For any reason? I mean, think about it. When you lie, all you really do is get into more trouble later. But then, lying does sometimes save you a lot of face. But is it worth losing somebody's trust? Is it worth all of the crap that you'll get? But, what if you're lying to protect yourself? Like, if a mass murderer asks where you live? Is that okay? Comment if you have any, well, comments. I woke up at two this afternoon. It was LOVELY. Seriously. Sleep is my favorite. Well, besides Geoffrey (name has been changed for his protection.) I do like Geoffrey. Random quote: "Voldemort is baffled by Harry's apparent lack of the ability to die." *Peace!

Day 1 (part 2)

Don't you just love it when you get those intimate, mother to daughter talks? Isn't it great when the woman who brought you into the world lectures you about one thing or another? Right. And Chuck Norris would look good in a tutu. Anyway, thought you might want to know that my mother gave me the boy talk a few days ago. It was one of the more painful things I've ever had to endure. Basically, she told me that I am allowed to hold hands, an arm around the shoulder is permissible, and I can have a kiss on the cheek once a year. Also, just five minutes ago, the whole family got a talk about our budget. Apparently, the TV has to go... :( Oh well. Life goes on. How are you people?

Day 1

Hello fellow bloggers! This is the story of my life, and how I can pretty much make a normal day completely bizarre. Today, I went to church. (It is, after all, Sunday.) I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I learned about The Plan of Salvation in Sunday School. It was actually pretty cool. I mean, I've obviously learned about it many times in my life, but today it struck me as unusually interesting. It was so... amazing. The idea that our Father in Heaven really cares enough about us to create this intricate plan so that we can live with him one day in the highest degree of celestial glory is so stimulating. It makes me want to be the person that I know I should be, but for some reason am not. Think about it. I mean, I'm only one tiny, insignificant person on this large, beautiful, horrible planet, but God cares enough about me to listen to my troubles and help me to overcome them. I think that is amazing. Here's my quotation of the day: "To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you are the world." I miss my friends who I was forced to move away from. Love you guys!